I'm going to try and wrap this thing up here folks...
We were in immigration in Miami..
So, we finally got through immigration and we sprinted towards the gate. We hadn't checked any baggage on the way home, so we just had two kids, two big bags and a camera bag. We tried to hurry, but Erickson was wanting to stop at every escalator. I don't blame him, they are cool. I wish I had two in my house. But, we needed to get on a plane, I didn't have time to introduce him to America yet.
We dashed to the gate and were relieved to find that our flight to Dallas was delayed. So, we gave each other a high 5 and John went to get some over-priced, bad food. We were sitting there awhile when we saw Tom. (He was on our flight from Port au Prince to Miami with his new daughter, Lise.) "Hey, what are yout doing here? We didn't realize we were on the same flight," we said to Tom.
"We you guys on the plane when we de-boarded?" Tom asked.
"What are you talking about?"
"We were on the plane and sat on the tarmac for about an hour, then they made us de-board. Evidentally Dallas had some snow and is not taking new arrivals. The flight was full."
John went up to the ticket counter. We deduced that we had actually missed the flight and when we didn't show up, they gave our seats away to stand-by people. So, now, we really didn't have tickets to Dallas. Tom went to the counter too, along with everyone else, to see about flight changes. (It's probably about 7 PM now.) So, I have 3 kids and all the luggage and John and Tom are in line. Then, we hear it announced that the flight has changed to a different gate. So, Tom and John practically run to the other gate. I get all three kids and the luggage and follow behind. I'm sitting on the floor with the kids for a good while (30-45 min.) when Erickson just takes off. He sprints away into the crowd. I practically throw Lovekender onto Lise and tell her "Rete ici" in Creole, "Stay here" and sprint after Erickson screaming, "ERICKSON" at the top of my lungs in the airport. I'm yelling to the crowd, "STOP HIM!" I finally catch him. I drag him,kicking and laughing, back to our spot on the floor. Luckily Lise and Love are still there. "KANPE!" STOP!! He thinks this is a funny game and keeps trying to run off.
I am reduced to holding him flailing. I'm sure this looks really great to all of the people shooting me sideways glances. I'm also feeling extra embarrassed when African-Americans look at me. I have know idea what they are really thinking, but I project that they are thinking something to the effect of, "Those poor black kids stuck with that pitiful excuse for a mother. She is so white and has no clue what she is doing." To add insult to injury, I'm wearing the remaining clothes that weren't shat upon. A thin, tight black t-shirt with white flowers on it with a teal spaghetti-strap knit sun dress on over it with coral colored socks with white poka-dots with Chaco sandals on. It's a great look, let me tell you. Meanwhile, Lovekender is just wearing a bathing suit. No socks, no shoes. It was all I had left clean. He did have some shirt on.
so, John finally comes back to us. He called American Airlines while in line and got us booked on a flight to Dallas. But, we don't know where Tom is. He is no where in sight. So, we take Lise, and Tom's luggage and go to our new gate. (We are on Gate number 3 now, I think.) Luckily, Tom is at that same gate waiting in line. Tom gets tickets too. They start boarding the flight. John is in line for boarding passes. They are about to close the flight. They say they can't get us on. I watch as the door to the plane closes. I really couldn't tell you what time it is at this point. (Let's say 8 or 9).
The poor Christmas Eve workers at the desk are trying to help the remaining people. What they really need is a stiff drink. The woman is trying to get us 4 tickets to Dallas that night. I mention that we really only need 3. She says, "How old is the youngest?" I say, "3, but he is 22 pounds and wearing 12 month clothing and I hold him the entire flight anyway. It is a wasted seat." She says, "I'll see what I can do." She gets us 4 tickets on the next flight out of Dallas. Unfortunately, the seats aren't together. She says they can probably change that when we get to the gate. We go sprinting off to another gate. (Did I mention that I am tired of sprinting while carrying a kid and luggage. And, that because John has to carry Erickson, I have to do the luggage. So, here I am in my ridiculous outfit with a tiny 3 year old strapped to me, a duffle bag over one shoulder and pulling a rolling carry on.) I wish I had it on video.
We get to the (fourth) gate and we start to board the flight. They are able to get our tickets 2 seats together and 2 seats. We board. John and Erickson are in row 7. Lovekender and I are in row 16. They tell us there will be a slight delay. That is when Love had his 1st bowel movement. The people in the seats infront of, next to , and behind me are covering their noses with the closest spare garmet they have. (I'm telling you it's foul folks.) It's embarrassing, but what the hell am I suppose to do? The sweet man behind me gets my bag from the overhead bin. I fish out a diaper and wipes one handed and head to the generously sized airplane bathroom. There, I change his blow out. I put him in some shorts that were dirty, but are now moved up to the "not so dirty" category. The man behind me puts my bag back up and we sit down. Love falls back asleep and I put him in the seat next to me with his head in my lap.
The flight attendants say we are ready for take off. The woman comes by and says that I need to be holding onto "my baby" as long as the plane is in motion. Meanwhile, I'm thinking, "This is the same 3 year olyd "baby" you all made me buy a seat for. Do I get my thousand dollars back?"
We start rolling out to the runway, then they announce that Dallas is still not taking new arrivals. We will now be enjoying a movie, "Up." My headphones don't work. I change another bowel movement. This time, I want to throw the soiled shorts away, but I'm afraid it will mess up the airplane trash system. So, I just stuff them in my bag that the nice man behind me keeps getting for me.
I ask the flight attendant, "If there is a seat by my husband, can I switch?"
"Sure," he says Gill. "Go right ahead." And then he heads on down the aisle. The words I should have chosen were, "Could you facilitate the single people around us moving seats so that we can sit together?" He must not be a dad.
The movie "UP" ended. We sat. Finally, we flew and 2 more diaper changes later, we somehow got to Dallas. We arrived at 2 AM
Dallas freezing!!!! Lovekender was half naked. I stopped and fished my jeans out of my bag and put them on under the dress. John's Dad had reserved us a hotel room, but it was far from the airport, "but he got a good deal." We stood out in the cold trying to find transportation to this hotel. There were no shuttles that went that far south of Dallas. I took the kids inside and John stood out there figuring out how the hell to get to this hotel. We ended up splitting a mini-van taxi with some other poor fools with hotels in no-man's land. We probably paid more for the transportation that the difference in a airport hotel price. But, alas, at least we had a place to stay. One thing I've learned from travel...anytime you think you are saving some money, you aren't really doing yourself any favors in the long run.
John and the boys passed out in the hotel. I HAD to take a shower. I didn't shower the entire time we were in Haiti. The Habitation Hatt shower wasn't doing it for me. I have to be REALLY dirty to take a cold shower. I'm too skinny, I never get warmed back up.
I finally went to bed at 3 AM.
MERRY CHRISTMAS!!! Dec. 25th, 2009
Lovekender woke up at 5:30AM with another blow out. I just stuck him in the bathtub. His first warm bath ever!! I did video that. I woke John up at 6:15. We packed up, headed to the airport.
We were delayed again, and our seats were separate again, but no matter. It was our last flight! We finally boarded and flew from Dallas to Lexington. Erickson had a screaming fit for an hour of the flight. It was really bad. We were becoming more numb to these fits, but the looks on the faces of everyone around are pretty awful. I'm sure it also looks horrible. A big 6'2" white guy, physically restraining a 35 lb. black boy. If John let him go, he would just flail and hit and kick the seats in front of us. He had to hold him. My poor husband deserves a trophy the size of New Jersey!
FINALLY, FINALLY, FINALLY, we landed in Lexington. The best feeling ever. For the first time, I teared up. We really were home. We made it. We didn't die in a firey crash! Lovekender's tiny body was in my arms. I daydreamed about that moment everyday for 21 months. Every time I saw a plane, I would think, "Someday, that will be me landing with the boys." And here we were!!!! HOME! HOME! HOME!! Nou rete ici ensemble! "WE live here together, " I kept telling the boys. (They probably thought, "we now live on an airplane?!") Poor little dudes. I'd pay a lot of money to know what they were thinking.
We got off the plane and headed down the little escalator. Violet, Mom, Dad and Cy were waiting for us. Violet was jumping up and down and screaming. She immediately hugged and hugged and hugged Erickson. AHHHHHHHHHHhhhhhh......we are home! We are family!!! Now, the real work begins.
This is the official end of "my haiti boys" blog. They aren't my Haiti boys any more. They are my sons, and before I know it, they will be young men. I just hope I can do right by them. I'm going to try my best. I'll make mistakes (and I already have), but there is always a new day to try again. I can always do better.
You can continue to follow our journey...
www.Lovekender.blogpot.com
www.VioletEstelle.blogspot.com
www.EricksonPierre.blogspot.com
Tuesday, January 5, 2010
Friday, January 1, 2010
the trip home... part deux.
Let's see, where was I. OK, yes, puke and poo.
So, Morning finally came and the owner of the hotel still never showed. John took Erickson to breakfast, while Lovekender and I curled up on the tablecloth on the edge of one of the nasty mattresses. When John got back, I went to go sit and have some coffee myself. I just ordered toast. There is something about the smell of human waste and burnin trash that really supresses one's appetite. I sat, sipping my coffee, nibbling my toast, thinking about work. I was so worried about missing my shift and about not being able to call. I was afraid I would lose my job. In the big picture, obviously my family is more important. But, now that I am the sole breadwinner for a household of 5, it is important to have a paycheck. Each dollar is accounted for. I'm one shift away from not having enough money to pay the mortgage and the second mortgage for the adoption. More importantly, I need the health insurance. These boys need medical attention. Perhaps surgery for Erickson, who appears to have an umbilical hernia and diastisis rectii. The night before, I had serisously contemplated flying home, as scheduled on the 23rd by myself so I could get to work by the 24th. However, considering the events of the previous 6 hours, I knew there was no way in hell John could manage these two kids on a plane by himself. So, I had to stay. And, how could I miss the boys' first flight home? Their first night in America?
I went back to the room and John and I got everything ready to go back to Marie's. We needed to get medicine for the boys and we were hoping to meet the boys' birthparents.
Gary picked us up and we headed to Marie's. On the way, Gary was going to stop and get an international phone card for John. Driving through the streets/creek beds of Haiti is so facinating. It's amazing to see the people, how they dress, carrying things on their heads, vendors on the street. There might be a man with a "tire store." He is sitting there with 6 tires and an umbrella. So, we pull over to one of these tattered umbrellas on the side of the "road." Gary talks to the vendor in Creole. The vendor man hands him these 3 little card board pieces. They look like the -save-ceareal-box-tops-for-education- thingies. Gary hands these to John and tells him that he just has to insert it into his phone and then he can call international. John tries to explain that there is no place in his phone to insert a small piece of cardboard. Jean Gary says that he will just put them in his cell phone and then we can use his to call international. John asks how many minutes we have. Gary says, "Probably about 11 or 12." John and I look at each other. We now have 11 or 12 minutes to call American Airlines and change 4 flights from tonight at 5:30 to tomorrow. We need to call my work and we need to call my parents and let them know what is going on and that they will have Violet another night.
So, we get to Marie's. I sit there with the boys while John tries to work Gary's phone. He finally gets through to American Airlines. I literally set my stopwatch. After nine minutes on hold, I cut John off. We need a new plan. Last resort: our cell phones. John calls his dad really quickly and tells him the situation. We need him to get on-line and give us several flight options. We will call back in about an hour. There is no telling how much that 4 minute conversation will cost!!! Roaming from Haiti. Not pretty.
I then take Gary's phone and call Central Baptist. I know my director is out of the office until the 29th, so I decide to just call HR directly. As the phone is ringing, there is a voice that says something in Creole, but all I catch is "deux minutes." I have 2 minutes!! HR answers the phone. I frantically try to explain to the receptionist, "I'm Kendra Adkisson, I am a nurse in Labor and Delievery, we are adopting 2 boys from Haiti and we are stuck down here because the embassy is closed and we can't get visas and I'm suppose to be at work tomorrow night at 7PM and this is a family emergency and I can't get there." The receptionist says, "Let me transfer you to someone who is in charge of that." (TRANSFER!!! I"ve got like 90 seconds dude!) So, I get transferred and I get voice mail for someone. I leave the above message as fast as I can on her answering machine and then add..."I have no internet and spotty cell phone reception so you have no way of calling me back. Please call my mother, Bonnie Adkisson, she might be able to explain more if we get a chance to talk to her. Her number is........." And with that, I hang up. I have absolutely no idea if the person I left a message with is working that day. I don't know if L&D will get the message. And again, I can't help but think I'm going to be fired.
I then call Mom. "Mom, I have about 2 minutes so just listen to me. The embassy is closed. We can't come home today. We are trying to book new flights. You'll have to watch Violet another night. Tell her we love her and Merry christmas. Human Resources might call you about where I am. Could you call a pedeatrician and try to get us appointments for next week? We'll let you know when we know when we are coming home. The boys are with us and it's great, but they are sick. Thank you and I love you, Bye." Mom mumbled something about Violet was fine and she loved us. Then we hung up. I think I went over the 2 minutes. I hope I didn't cost Gary about $80 on his phone bill.
The people at the orphanage said Marie would be back by about 10:00 AM. So, we just hung out on Marie's porch, playing with the boys. Marie came back. She gave me amoxicillin and Flagyl for the boys. However, none of it had been refrigerated and it was expired. It also seemed pretty watery. Definitely not the long term plan, but it would have to do for today. She also made Lovekender some ...well, ....gruel. It looked disgusting. Lovekender practically inhaled it. I asked Marie what it was. She said it was ground rice and flour. Note to self.
Marie said that the birthparents might not come after all because it was raining. But, to our surprise, they showed up later. We saw the mother walk through the orphanage gate with a sheet of plastic over her. The mom and dad walked on to the porch and sat with us. The dad immediately began talking and Marie was translating. She said, "He says he is so happy to meet you and that we are all family now." As she was translating, the dad had his arm around me and I was holding the mother's arm. We asked Marie to tell them that "We love Erickson and Lovekender and it is an honor that they trust us to raise their precious boys. We will do our best. We love them so much." I brought out my list of questions to ask the birthparents. I'll save this part of the story for Erickson and Lovekender. It is their story to tell, not mine.
It was a beautiful time with the parents on the porch that rainy day in Haiti. We have a lot of pictures and video. I'll be framing a large picture of all of us together. The boys will always know that their beautiful parents made the hardest choice parents can make. In America, we have the luxury of keeping our children. When people say, "I just can't imagine how those parents could do that!", I just think to myself..."of course you can't imagine it." I wish it were mandatory for every high school softmore to go to a third world country. It might put an end to the "me" generation. If you didn't have a job, no prospect of a job, no education, pitiful living conditions, no running water, no electricity, no access to medical care, no food to feed your child, you might send them to someone who could. If I were on a bus with Violet and it was about to crash and there were people standing on the side of the road with outstretched arms, I'd throw Violet out to whomever was there. That's all I need to say about that.
After visiting with the birth parents for over an hour, they left. I took a picture of them as they walked out the gate of the orphanage....my sons' mother coverd in plastic. I wonder if I'll ever see her again. I wonder how Erickson and Lovekender's younger brother Jameson's life will be there in Haiti.
Meanwhile, John had called his dad and we had tickets to leave Haiti on the 24th at 1:10 PM. It cost $400 to change all of our tickets, plus we had to get a hotel room for Dallas the night of the 24th. There were no flights to go straight through on the same day.
We left Marie's and headed back to the Habitation Hatt. John took a little snooze and I tried to entertain the boys by the pool. It was actually too chilly to get in (overcast and drizziling). I think I just ate a protein bar and then we went to sleep early. I still didn't feel dirty enough to take a shower in Haiti. (Yes, our room had been mopped and we had new linens.) That night we didn't have copious amounts of bodily fluids.
DECEMBER 24th, 2009
We packed up all our things. We left behind several pooped on outfits. I didn't want to throw them away because they just needed to be washed. So, I just sat them beside the trash can. I have no doubt that they were found and used by someone.
Gary picked us up and we headed to Marie's again. We picked up Megan who was there to adopt Lovely. We said good-bye to Marie and headed to the Embassy for our 9:00 AM appointment. We waited for only about a half an hour and we got the boys' passports with VISAS!!!! However, we immediately noticed that their last names were Ferguson.
Insert side note: John and I have different last names. I already had a name when I got married and I'm not John's property, so as any self-respecting feminist does, I kept MY name. It's hard to say and spell, but alas, it is mine. (Actually it is my father's, but what to do?) I'm always suprised at how confusing me having my own name is to people. From block buster, to the DMV, people seemed baffled.
At any rate, I filled out all of the adoption paperwork. I put myself as the "petitioner" and John as the spouce. So, when we went to Haiti last year, the embassy had listed the boys' names as Erickson Adkisson and Lovekender Adkisson. We laughed about it at the time. The problem is, we made the boys' plane reservations with the name Adkisson. We immediately had to call John's Dad (on John's cell, yikes!) and ask him to call back American Airlines and change the tickets to the last name of Ferguson. Long story short, (too late) it was $600 just to change the NAMES, not the flights!!! John's Dad, after many threats, got AA to change the fee to only $300.00.
We left the embassy and headed to the airport. Erickson immediately had a breakdown. John had to practically drag Erickson through. I had Lovekender in my Ergo baby carrier and all the luggage, while John dealt with Erickson. All the Haitians were trying to talk to him and tell him what was going on, but it was no use. Finally, when we got to an escalator and Erickson was so mezmorized, that we didn't hear another peep...until we boarded the plane. Erickson did his best rendition of a complete and total meltdown on the plane from Haiti to Miami. He was thrashing and kicking, so John had to physically restrain him. (That looks REALLY good to a plane full of Haitians, I'm sure!) Erickson finally screamed himself into a deep sleep. He missed the entire flying experience.
When we landed in Miami, we had to go through customs and immigration. We were "held" back in this special room. We watched the minutes tick by and new we would miss our connecting flight to Dallas. I was also sweating bullets to call work before 5PM. But, there were big signs posted everywhere, "ABSOLUTELY NO CELL PHONE USE." The homeland security people look like a serious bunch. I didn't want to push it. So, I obeyed.
More tales from immigration another day....We will continue with the airport and that will be my last post for this blog!
So, Morning finally came and the owner of the hotel still never showed. John took Erickson to breakfast, while Lovekender and I curled up on the tablecloth on the edge of one of the nasty mattresses. When John got back, I went to go sit and have some coffee myself. I just ordered toast. There is something about the smell of human waste and burnin trash that really supresses one's appetite. I sat, sipping my coffee, nibbling my toast, thinking about work. I was so worried about missing my shift and about not being able to call. I was afraid I would lose my job. In the big picture, obviously my family is more important. But, now that I am the sole breadwinner for a household of 5, it is important to have a paycheck. Each dollar is accounted for. I'm one shift away from not having enough money to pay the mortgage and the second mortgage for the adoption. More importantly, I need the health insurance. These boys need medical attention. Perhaps surgery for Erickson, who appears to have an umbilical hernia and diastisis rectii. The night before, I had serisously contemplated flying home, as scheduled on the 23rd by myself so I could get to work by the 24th. However, considering the events of the previous 6 hours, I knew there was no way in hell John could manage these two kids on a plane by himself. So, I had to stay. And, how could I miss the boys' first flight home? Their first night in America?
I went back to the room and John and I got everything ready to go back to Marie's. We needed to get medicine for the boys and we were hoping to meet the boys' birthparents.
Gary picked us up and we headed to Marie's. On the way, Gary was going to stop and get an international phone card for John. Driving through the streets/creek beds of Haiti is so facinating. It's amazing to see the people, how they dress, carrying things on their heads, vendors on the street. There might be a man with a "tire store." He is sitting there with 6 tires and an umbrella. So, we pull over to one of these tattered umbrellas on the side of the "road." Gary talks to the vendor in Creole. The vendor man hands him these 3 little card board pieces. They look like the -save-ceareal-box-tops-for-education- thingies. Gary hands these to John and tells him that he just has to insert it into his phone and then he can call international. John tries to explain that there is no place in his phone to insert a small piece of cardboard. Jean Gary says that he will just put them in his cell phone and then we can use his to call international. John asks how many minutes we have. Gary says, "Probably about 11 or 12." John and I look at each other. We now have 11 or 12 minutes to call American Airlines and change 4 flights from tonight at 5:30 to tomorrow. We need to call my work and we need to call my parents and let them know what is going on and that they will have Violet another night.
So, we get to Marie's. I sit there with the boys while John tries to work Gary's phone. He finally gets through to American Airlines. I literally set my stopwatch. After nine minutes on hold, I cut John off. We need a new plan. Last resort: our cell phones. John calls his dad really quickly and tells him the situation. We need him to get on-line and give us several flight options. We will call back in about an hour. There is no telling how much that 4 minute conversation will cost!!! Roaming from Haiti. Not pretty.
I then take Gary's phone and call Central Baptist. I know my director is out of the office until the 29th, so I decide to just call HR directly. As the phone is ringing, there is a voice that says something in Creole, but all I catch is "deux minutes." I have 2 minutes!! HR answers the phone. I frantically try to explain to the receptionist, "I'm Kendra Adkisson, I am a nurse in Labor and Delievery, we are adopting 2 boys from Haiti and we are stuck down here because the embassy is closed and we can't get visas and I'm suppose to be at work tomorrow night at 7PM and this is a family emergency and I can't get there." The receptionist says, "Let me transfer you to someone who is in charge of that." (TRANSFER!!! I"ve got like 90 seconds dude!) So, I get transferred and I get voice mail for someone. I leave the above message as fast as I can on her answering machine and then add..."I have no internet and spotty cell phone reception so you have no way of calling me back. Please call my mother, Bonnie Adkisson, she might be able to explain more if we get a chance to talk to her. Her number is........." And with that, I hang up. I have absolutely no idea if the person I left a message with is working that day. I don't know if L&D will get the message. And again, I can't help but think I'm going to be fired.
I then call Mom. "Mom, I have about 2 minutes so just listen to me. The embassy is closed. We can't come home today. We are trying to book new flights. You'll have to watch Violet another night. Tell her we love her and Merry christmas. Human Resources might call you about where I am. Could you call a pedeatrician and try to get us appointments for next week? We'll let you know when we know when we are coming home. The boys are with us and it's great, but they are sick. Thank you and I love you, Bye." Mom mumbled something about Violet was fine and she loved us. Then we hung up. I think I went over the 2 minutes. I hope I didn't cost Gary about $80 on his phone bill.
The people at the orphanage said Marie would be back by about 10:00 AM. So, we just hung out on Marie's porch, playing with the boys. Marie came back. She gave me amoxicillin and Flagyl for the boys. However, none of it had been refrigerated and it was expired. It also seemed pretty watery. Definitely not the long term plan, but it would have to do for today. She also made Lovekender some ...well, ....gruel. It looked disgusting. Lovekender practically inhaled it. I asked Marie what it was. She said it was ground rice and flour. Note to self.
Marie said that the birthparents might not come after all because it was raining. But, to our surprise, they showed up later. We saw the mother walk through the orphanage gate with a sheet of plastic over her. The mom and dad walked on to the porch and sat with us. The dad immediately began talking and Marie was translating. She said, "He says he is so happy to meet you and that we are all family now." As she was translating, the dad had his arm around me and I was holding the mother's arm. We asked Marie to tell them that "We love Erickson and Lovekender and it is an honor that they trust us to raise their precious boys. We will do our best. We love them so much." I brought out my list of questions to ask the birthparents. I'll save this part of the story for Erickson and Lovekender. It is their story to tell, not mine.
It was a beautiful time with the parents on the porch that rainy day in Haiti. We have a lot of pictures and video. I'll be framing a large picture of all of us together. The boys will always know that their beautiful parents made the hardest choice parents can make. In America, we have the luxury of keeping our children. When people say, "I just can't imagine how those parents could do that!", I just think to myself..."of course you can't imagine it." I wish it were mandatory for every high school softmore to go to a third world country. It might put an end to the "me" generation. If you didn't have a job, no prospect of a job, no education, pitiful living conditions, no running water, no electricity, no access to medical care, no food to feed your child, you might send them to someone who could. If I were on a bus with Violet and it was about to crash and there were people standing on the side of the road with outstretched arms, I'd throw Violet out to whomever was there. That's all I need to say about that.
After visiting with the birth parents for over an hour, they left. I took a picture of them as they walked out the gate of the orphanage....my sons' mother coverd in plastic. I wonder if I'll ever see her again. I wonder how Erickson and Lovekender's younger brother Jameson's life will be there in Haiti.
Meanwhile, John had called his dad and we had tickets to leave Haiti on the 24th at 1:10 PM. It cost $400 to change all of our tickets, plus we had to get a hotel room for Dallas the night of the 24th. There were no flights to go straight through on the same day.
We left Marie's and headed back to the Habitation Hatt. John took a little snooze and I tried to entertain the boys by the pool. It was actually too chilly to get in (overcast and drizziling). I think I just ate a protein bar and then we went to sleep early. I still didn't feel dirty enough to take a shower in Haiti. (Yes, our room had been mopped and we had new linens.) That night we didn't have copious amounts of bodily fluids.
DECEMBER 24th, 2009
We packed up all our things. We left behind several pooped on outfits. I didn't want to throw them away because they just needed to be washed. So, I just sat them beside the trash can. I have no doubt that they were found and used by someone.
Gary picked us up and we headed to Marie's again. We picked up Megan who was there to adopt Lovely. We said good-bye to Marie and headed to the Embassy for our 9:00 AM appointment. We waited for only about a half an hour and we got the boys' passports with VISAS!!!! However, we immediately noticed that their last names were Ferguson.
Insert side note: John and I have different last names. I already had a name when I got married and I'm not John's property, so as any self-respecting feminist does, I kept MY name. It's hard to say and spell, but alas, it is mine. (Actually it is my father's, but what to do?) I'm always suprised at how confusing me having my own name is to people. From block buster, to the DMV, people seemed baffled.
At any rate, I filled out all of the adoption paperwork. I put myself as the "petitioner" and John as the spouce. So, when we went to Haiti last year, the embassy had listed the boys' names as Erickson Adkisson and Lovekender Adkisson. We laughed about it at the time. The problem is, we made the boys' plane reservations with the name Adkisson. We immediately had to call John's Dad (on John's cell, yikes!) and ask him to call back American Airlines and change the tickets to the last name of Ferguson. Long story short, (too late) it was $600 just to change the NAMES, not the flights!!! John's Dad, after many threats, got AA to change the fee to only $300.00.
We left the embassy and headed to the airport. Erickson immediately had a breakdown. John had to practically drag Erickson through. I had Lovekender in my Ergo baby carrier and all the luggage, while John dealt with Erickson. All the Haitians were trying to talk to him and tell him what was going on, but it was no use. Finally, when we got to an escalator and Erickson was so mezmorized, that we didn't hear another peep...until we boarded the plane. Erickson did his best rendition of a complete and total meltdown on the plane from Haiti to Miami. He was thrashing and kicking, so John had to physically restrain him. (That looks REALLY good to a plane full of Haitians, I'm sure!) Erickson finally screamed himself into a deep sleep. He missed the entire flying experience.
When we landed in Miami, we had to go through customs and immigration. We were "held" back in this special room. We watched the minutes tick by and new we would miss our connecting flight to Dallas. I was also sweating bullets to call work before 5PM. But, there were big signs posted everywhere, "ABSOLUTELY NO CELL PHONE USE." The homeland security people look like a serious bunch. I didn't want to push it. So, I obeyed.
More tales from immigration another day....We will continue with the airport and that will be my last post for this blog!
Monday, December 28, 2009
The nightmare before Christmas....Part One
John and I just took an epic journey to Haiti to pick up the boys.
(Prologue: December was very busy for me. I worked Dec 4th, 5th and 6th nights and then left Dec. 7th for a week orientation at Frontier school of midwifery. Then, came home on the 11th, worked that night, the 12th and the 13th. I was pretty much comatosed the 14th, felt jet lagged on the 15th, our anniversary was the 16th, and on Thursday the 17th, we got the email that the boys were scheduled for visa appointments on the 22nd. Visas are issued on the next business day. Usually, people don't go down to pick up their kids until they have visas in hand. But, I had to work the night of the 23rd and 24th, and we wanted to be home for Christmas. SO, after much debate, John and I decided to fly down on the 22nd, spend the night, go to the embassy to get visas on the 23rd and then fly out the night of the 23rd. Spend the night in Miami and then be home on Christmas Eve by about 1:oo. Then, I would work that night. Amy Wheeler agreed to work the 23rd for me (THANK YOU!!). So, I had 6 days notice, and I worked 38 of those hours, slept a little and packed and cleaned and did Christmas shopping. Violet went to spend the night at my Mom's for about the 4th time in Dec.
Tues: Dec. 22nd- John and I woke up at 3:15 AM to get to the airport by 4AM. We flew from Lex. to Dallas to Miami to Haiti. Our flight to Haiti was delayed about an hour and a half. Right as I got on the plane, I saw that I had a message from Stephanie (our adoption agency rep.). I was trying to listen to it on the plane with bad reception and the pilot announcing that we needed to fasten seat belts, etc. So, all I heard was, "This is Stephanie, something something....SNAFU at the embassy....something....not sure if you can check messages.....something......" Despite warnings to turn of all electronic devices, I listend to the message again. Still, all I heard was "SNAFU with the embassy." So, for the next 2 1/2 hours, I was very worried. A million "worst-case" scenarios ran through my head. It made for a worrisome flight. Everything in Haiti is pretty much the true military definition of "SNAFU: Situation Normal All F*&^% Up" It's actually a perfect description.
Finally we landed in Haiti. Our plan was to find Big. He's the biggest guy in Haiti, hence the name "Big." He stands outside the airport and gets you where you need to go. We were going to find Big and have him call Veniel (the owner of Wall's guest house where we made reservations. We love it there. It is right across the "street" from the orhanage.") However, we couldn't find Big and John Gary was there to pick us up. How John Gary knew to pick us up is still a mystery. Our adoption agency person had told us to hire him as a driver. But, since were were staying across the street, we didn't think it was necessary. At any rate, John Gary was there at the airport. We said, "We are staying at Wall's."
Gary said, "You can't stay at Wall's. Marie doesn't let "her kids" stay there. OK.....? (I had heard last year that there was some falling out between Marie and Veniel. I didn't think it would be a problem a year later. Plus, I didn't think she could say anything about it since they aren't really "her kids" anymore.) But, nonetheless, we didn't want to tick off Marie. Getting visas for our boys was completely in her hands.
So, we said, "Where should we stay?" Gary told us about 2 different places. We didn't really care which one, so he told us to stay at the Habitation Hatt.
We got to Marie's house, the office of Petite Angels de Chantal, and where some of the children stay. Our boys had been here, at her house, in Port-au-Prince for days so they could go to the embassy to get visas and to get medical appointments. Marie came to greet us on her porch and again re-iterated that we could not stay at Wall's. (Let me interject here that Marie can speak English, but it is slightly broken. You are never quite sure if you understood what she just told you and you are never quite sure that she understood you. I must also say her English is a million times more than my Creole capabilities.She is also large in stature, taller than I, maybe 5'11" and a very no-nonsense kind of woman.) I continue...We didn't ask questions. Then, she proceeded to tell us that they went for their visa appointments today and got the "yellow ticket." (The coveted ticket you get to present to the embassy to get your visa.) Marie said, "The embassy will be closed tomorrow for a Christmas party, so we will go get their visas on the morning of the 24th," Marie said
"But our plane leaves tomorrow night at 5:30," we said in dismay.
"Oh, I wish I had known because I could have gone back to the embassy this afternoon to get their visas. It is better for you to go home with Megan and Tom on the 24th, " Marie said, very non-chalantly. (Megan and Tom are 2 other adoptive parents who were also coming to pick up their kids.)
"We thought they were open on the 23rd. We thought they were only closed for Christmas," we said.
" When I went today, they said they are closed tomorrow for a Christmas party, " Marie said.
"I need to be home by the 24th to work that night. I am a nurse...enfymie," I tried to explain in vain.
"It is no problem. You can call American Airlines and change your flight." Marie suggested. Both Gary and Marie agreed that the Habitation Hatt would have internet and that Gary could get us international calling cards. We found out the hard way on our first trip that even a quick 4 min call to the States costs AN INCREDIBLE AMOUNT.
You have got to be kidding me!!! John and I just looked at each other wide eyed and shell shocked. What were we to do? There was nothing we could do. We were stuck, in Haiti. I could fly home by myself the following day, or I could stay with him, but risk losing my job because of no-call, no-show on CHRISTMAS EVE!!! I was a mess inside, but, I just sat there calmly.
Marie went to go get the boys and bring them out to us. They walked besider her holding her hands. They were adorable...and TINY!!! Erickson smiled a little and Lovekender was very stoic. We held them and loved them. They were about the same size as they were last year.
Before Gary took us to the Habitat Hatt, John said he wanted to walk over to Vinele's and tell him we wouldn't be staying there tonight. Marie and Gary said, "No, you can just call him from the hotel." So we left.
After a very bumpy ride, we arrived at Habitation Hatt. (The roads in Haiti are comprable to creek beds. Drivers just zig zag back and forth to stay out of water and trenches. It's pretty much just dirt and gravel, trash and water.)
At the front desk, John learned that our "hotel" was $106 a night. (Much more than Wall's.) In addition, we would now have to have Gary drive us. Which, turned out to be $60 + $80 + $60 for the three days. WOW!!! Not to mention, we would now not be needing our Hotel in Miami on the night of the 23rd which we already bought. And, it's expensive to change tickets. We knew this was the chance we took, coming before the boys had visas. But, the part that hurt the most was when Marie said, "I could have picked up their visas today." That kept echoing through my head!!!! So, Gary left us there with the boys. We somehow managed not to get a calling card and the hotel had wireless, but no computer. Go figure.
We went to our rooms with absolutely no plan for how we were going to get home. We decided that we would just have to wait until in the morning when Gary could somehow manage to get us a calling card.
We all went to bed. I woke up at about 3:30AM (Wed. Dec. 23) to a restless Lovekender. I reached over to pat him back to sleep, and my hand was in poo. Explosive diarrhea to be more exact. There were splatter marks on the sheet despite the fact that he had on a diaper and pajamas. I got up, took Lovekender to the bathroom. I stood him on the floor while I stripped down. He then proceeded to poop all over the floor. (It’s a very FOUL smelling watery diarrhea that only a sick orphan could have.) I put him on the toilet and water shot out from his behind. I got him cleaned up in the sink, dried him off and I got washed up and put on new clothes. John stripped the bed of the sheet (there was no mattress pad.) The mattress underneath was soaked with poo. It needed to be burned at this point. John went up to the front desk to obtain more sheets and towel. I put Lovekender down next to Erickson on the other bed. I went to the bathroom to wipe up poo and came back to Love in a pile of his own vomit. Erickson rolled over in it too. So, I ran Love to the bathroom. He projectile vomited into the toilet…as in it splashes back out there is so much force. I stripped down both boys. John put Erickson and the pukey clothes in the shower. ( By the way, John said no one would be able to help us until 6 Am when someone came with the keys to the linens.) I had no towel for Lovekender. I dried him off with my clothes. We put both boys back to sleep on the bed. I told John I was going to take a walk (In the rain). I returned to the cries of Lovekender. He had pooped again. That bedspread was ruined. I stripped Love again, etc. etc. I then went to the front desk in tears. I said to the security guard, “Tsimouns mwen malad. ( I then gestured explosive diarrhea and projectile vomiting. Those are universal signs right? Mwen bezwen aide!”” My children are sick and I need help! I then forced him to come with me to our room so he could fully understand. WE had set all the linens outside the door in the rain because they were too foul smelling to have in the room. We walked in to Lovekender sitting naked on the tile floor and Erickson standing there shell shocked. Our mattresses were stripped bare and stained. The guy still said he couldn’t get to the linens. We asked if we could change rooms. He said he didn’t have the keys to that either. In front of him, I took everything off the table and wrapped Lovekender in the tablecloth. John and I sat there waiting for daylight. I, holding a sleeping Lovkender in a table cloth; John, with Erickson in his arms. We left the door open and listened to the rain.
That is where I leave you my dear reader….until I have time to post the next day of the story. Each day is it’s own special treat.
(Prologue: December was very busy for me. I worked Dec 4th, 5th and 6th nights and then left Dec. 7th for a week orientation at Frontier school of midwifery. Then, came home on the 11th, worked that night, the 12th and the 13th. I was pretty much comatosed the 14th, felt jet lagged on the 15th, our anniversary was the 16th, and on Thursday the 17th, we got the email that the boys were scheduled for visa appointments on the 22nd. Visas are issued on the next business day. Usually, people don't go down to pick up their kids until they have visas in hand. But, I had to work the night of the 23rd and 24th, and we wanted to be home for Christmas. SO, after much debate, John and I decided to fly down on the 22nd, spend the night, go to the embassy to get visas on the 23rd and then fly out the night of the 23rd. Spend the night in Miami and then be home on Christmas Eve by about 1:oo. Then, I would work that night. Amy Wheeler agreed to work the 23rd for me (THANK YOU!!). So, I had 6 days notice, and I worked 38 of those hours, slept a little and packed and cleaned and did Christmas shopping. Violet went to spend the night at my Mom's for about the 4th time in Dec.
Tues: Dec. 22nd- John and I woke up at 3:15 AM to get to the airport by 4AM. We flew from Lex. to Dallas to Miami to Haiti. Our flight to Haiti was delayed about an hour and a half. Right as I got on the plane, I saw that I had a message from Stephanie (our adoption agency rep.). I was trying to listen to it on the plane with bad reception and the pilot announcing that we needed to fasten seat belts, etc. So, all I heard was, "This is Stephanie, something something....SNAFU at the embassy....something....not sure if you can check messages.....something......" Despite warnings to turn of all electronic devices, I listend to the message again. Still, all I heard was "SNAFU with the embassy." So, for the next 2 1/2 hours, I was very worried. A million "worst-case" scenarios ran through my head. It made for a worrisome flight. Everything in Haiti is pretty much the true military definition of "SNAFU: Situation Normal All F*&^% Up" It's actually a perfect description.
Finally we landed in Haiti. Our plan was to find Big. He's the biggest guy in Haiti, hence the name "Big." He stands outside the airport and gets you where you need to go. We were going to find Big and have him call Veniel (the owner of Wall's guest house where we made reservations. We love it there. It is right across the "street" from the orhanage.") However, we couldn't find Big and John Gary was there to pick us up. How John Gary knew to pick us up is still a mystery. Our adoption agency person had told us to hire him as a driver. But, since were were staying across the street, we didn't think it was necessary. At any rate, John Gary was there at the airport. We said, "We are staying at Wall's."
Gary said, "You can't stay at Wall's. Marie doesn't let "her kids" stay there. OK.....? (I had heard last year that there was some falling out between Marie and Veniel. I didn't think it would be a problem a year later. Plus, I didn't think she could say anything about it since they aren't really "her kids" anymore.) But, nonetheless, we didn't want to tick off Marie. Getting visas for our boys was completely in her hands.
So, we said, "Where should we stay?" Gary told us about 2 different places. We didn't really care which one, so he told us to stay at the Habitation Hatt.
We got to Marie's house, the office of Petite Angels de Chantal, and where some of the children stay. Our boys had been here, at her house, in Port-au-Prince for days so they could go to the embassy to get visas and to get medical appointments. Marie came to greet us on her porch and again re-iterated that we could not stay at Wall's. (Let me interject here that Marie can speak English, but it is slightly broken. You are never quite sure if you understood what she just told you and you are never quite sure that she understood you. I must also say her English is a million times more than my Creole capabilities.She is also large in stature, taller than I, maybe 5'11" and a very no-nonsense kind of woman.) I continue...We didn't ask questions. Then, she proceeded to tell us that they went for their visa appointments today and got the "yellow ticket." (The coveted ticket you get to present to the embassy to get your visa.) Marie said, "The embassy will be closed tomorrow for a Christmas party, so we will go get their visas on the morning of the 24th," Marie said
"But our plane leaves tomorrow night at 5:30," we said in dismay.
"Oh, I wish I had known because I could have gone back to the embassy this afternoon to get their visas. It is better for you to go home with Megan and Tom on the 24th, " Marie said, very non-chalantly. (Megan and Tom are 2 other adoptive parents who were also coming to pick up their kids.)
"We thought they were open on the 23rd. We thought they were only closed for Christmas," we said.
" When I went today, they said they are closed tomorrow for a Christmas party, " Marie said.
"I need to be home by the 24th to work that night. I am a nurse...enfymie," I tried to explain in vain.
"It is no problem. You can call American Airlines and change your flight." Marie suggested. Both Gary and Marie agreed that the Habitation Hatt would have internet and that Gary could get us international calling cards. We found out the hard way on our first trip that even a quick 4 min call to the States costs AN INCREDIBLE AMOUNT.
You have got to be kidding me!!! John and I just looked at each other wide eyed and shell shocked. What were we to do? There was nothing we could do. We were stuck, in Haiti. I could fly home by myself the following day, or I could stay with him, but risk losing my job because of no-call, no-show on CHRISTMAS EVE!!! I was a mess inside, but, I just sat there calmly.
Marie went to go get the boys and bring them out to us. They walked besider her holding her hands. They were adorable...and TINY!!! Erickson smiled a little and Lovekender was very stoic. We held them and loved them. They were about the same size as they were last year.
Before Gary took us to the Habitat Hatt, John said he wanted to walk over to Vinele's and tell him we wouldn't be staying there tonight. Marie and Gary said, "No, you can just call him from the hotel." So we left.
After a very bumpy ride, we arrived at Habitation Hatt. (The roads in Haiti are comprable to creek beds. Drivers just zig zag back and forth to stay out of water and trenches. It's pretty much just dirt and gravel, trash and water.)
At the front desk, John learned that our "hotel" was $106 a night. (Much more than Wall's.) In addition, we would now have to have Gary drive us. Which, turned out to be $60 + $80 + $60 for the three days. WOW!!! Not to mention, we would now not be needing our Hotel in Miami on the night of the 23rd which we already bought. And, it's expensive to change tickets. We knew this was the chance we took, coming before the boys had visas. But, the part that hurt the most was when Marie said, "I could have picked up their visas today." That kept echoing through my head!!!! So, Gary left us there with the boys. We somehow managed not to get a calling card and the hotel had wireless, but no computer. Go figure.
We went to our rooms with absolutely no plan for how we were going to get home. We decided that we would just have to wait until in the morning when Gary could somehow manage to get us a calling card.
We all went to bed. I woke up at about 3:30AM (Wed. Dec. 23) to a restless Lovekender. I reached over to pat him back to sleep, and my hand was in poo. Explosive diarrhea to be more exact. There were splatter marks on the sheet despite the fact that he had on a diaper and pajamas. I got up, took Lovekender to the bathroom. I stood him on the floor while I stripped down. He then proceeded to poop all over the floor. (It’s a very FOUL smelling watery diarrhea that only a sick orphan could have.) I put him on the toilet and water shot out from his behind. I got him cleaned up in the sink, dried him off and I got washed up and put on new clothes. John stripped the bed of the sheet (there was no mattress pad.) The mattress underneath was soaked with poo. It needed to be burned at this point. John went up to the front desk to obtain more sheets and towel. I put Lovekender down next to Erickson on the other bed. I went to the bathroom to wipe up poo and came back to Love in a pile of his own vomit. Erickson rolled over in it too. So, I ran Love to the bathroom. He projectile vomited into the toilet…as in it splashes back out there is so much force. I stripped down both boys. John put Erickson and the pukey clothes in the shower. ( By the way, John said no one would be able to help us until 6 Am when someone came with the keys to the linens.) I had no towel for Lovekender. I dried him off with my clothes. We put both boys back to sleep on the bed. I told John I was going to take a walk (In the rain). I returned to the cries of Lovekender. He had pooped again. That bedspread was ruined. I stripped Love again, etc. etc. I then went to the front desk in tears. I said to the security guard, “Tsimouns mwen malad. ( I then gestured explosive diarrhea and projectile vomiting. Those are universal signs right? Mwen bezwen aide!”” My children are sick and I need help! I then forced him to come with me to our room so he could fully understand. WE had set all the linens outside the door in the rain because they were too foul smelling to have in the room. We walked in to Lovekender sitting naked on the tile floor and Erickson standing there shell shocked. Our mattresses were stripped bare and stained. The guy still said he couldn’t get to the linens. We asked if we could change rooms. He said he didn’t have the keys to that either. In front of him, I took everything off the table and wrapped Lovekender in the tablecloth. John and I sat there waiting for daylight. I, holding a sleeping Lovkender in a table cloth; John, with Erickson in his arms. We left the door open and listened to the rain.
That is where I leave you my dear reader….until I have time to post the next day of the story. Each day is it’s own special treat.
Thursday, December 17, 2009
Visa appointments!
Today we got the final email...the final piece of important news....the boys have visa appointments scheduled for 8:30 am Dec. 22nd. At this appointment, (If all goes well and all the paperwork is accounted for) they Power of attorney will get a "yellow slip." The following day, she will take these yellow slips and get the boys' visas. (Theoretically.)
So, after much debate, John and I have decided to fly out on the 22nd, spend the 23rd day in Haiti and hope beyond all hope that the boys ACTUALLY get their visas. If so, we are flying out the night of the 23rd, overnighting in Miami, and arriving home on Christmas eve at about noon to Lexington. (I then have to go to work Christmas eve night. Total bummer. But, thankful I can provide a wonderful home and food for these kiddos.) John will just have to do the first bath and bedtime solo!! I guess the husband of a future midwife has to get used to that. So, the first real full day the boys have in Lexington will be Christmas day...which of course is insanity. No telling what these poor children will think! Talk about some culture shock. (Not to mention pricey airline tickets! Zoiks!)
If the boys, for some reason, do not get Visas as scheduled, I will fly home to work my shift, and John will bring the boys after getting visas.
We are excited and nervous!!! Our lives are about to turn upside down! These past 6 years of trying to adopt have been an adventure. But, I guess the adventure is just beginning! It's exciting, but, it ain't over till it's over. I feel like I wont' believe it until we land in Lexington. I can't wait to hold those little guys in my arms. I will, in just 5 short days!
So, after much debate, John and I have decided to fly out on the 22nd, spend the 23rd day in Haiti and hope beyond all hope that the boys ACTUALLY get their visas. If so, we are flying out the night of the 23rd, overnighting in Miami, and arriving home on Christmas eve at about noon to Lexington. (I then have to go to work Christmas eve night. Total bummer. But, thankful I can provide a wonderful home and food for these kiddos.) John will just have to do the first bath and bedtime solo!! I guess the husband of a future midwife has to get used to that. So, the first real full day the boys have in Lexington will be Christmas day...which of course is insanity. No telling what these poor children will think! Talk about some culture shock. (Not to mention pricey airline tickets! Zoiks!)
If the boys, for some reason, do not get Visas as scheduled, I will fly home to work my shift, and John will bring the boys after getting visas.
We are excited and nervous!!! Our lives are about to turn upside down! These past 6 years of trying to adopt have been an adventure. But, I guess the adventure is just beginning! It's exciting, but, it ain't over till it's over. I feel like I wont' believe it until we land in Lexington. I can't wait to hold those little guys in my arms. I will, in just 5 short days!
Wednesday, December 16, 2009
one step closer to visa
Dear Mr. and Mrs. Ferguson Adkisson,
Please be informed that the I-600 petitions you filed at this office on behalf of Erickson and Love Kender Pierre Louis have been approved. Your case have been transferred to the Adoption Unit of the Consular Section for the visa process. This completes all action by this service on the petition. The Consular Section will soon contact you to follow up on your case.
Happy Holidays!
Regards,
USCIS Haiti
Wednesday, December 2, 2009
Meriah Carey has it right!
"I don't want a lot for Christmas. There is just one thing I need.
I don't care about the presents underneath the Christmas tree.
I just want you for my own. More than you could ever know.
Make my wish come true. All I want for Christmas is you."
I don't care about the presents underneath the Christmas tree.
I just want you for my own. More than you could ever know.
Make my wish come true. All I want for Christmas is you."
Thursday, November 26, 2009
Thanksgiving
We had a wonderful Thanksgiving....giving thanks that my boys are VERY close to coming home. I was sad that yet again, anyone under 35 qualifies for the kid table. So, it was John, Cyrus, me and Violet. I need to get these 2 boys home so we have a real kid table! That, and so Violet won't have to play with the dog. That, and so my boys can experience a FEAST!
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